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Yet Another Lame Start?

Posted on 10 October 2004 | 10:53 am by Lame

This blog business is tiring. Very tiring. Have had so many false starts. Damn. I hope this is it. I hope I can stick to this blog now for a long long time.

The following are reminders for me:
1. I can choose to publish at a brand new URL any time I want and need not create a new blog for that.
2. This is IT. No more hiding. No more new blog creation. No more trying to portray only my dark side on the blog. This will be me. The good. The bad. The ugly. All at the same place. I just don't have it in me to keep multiple blogs for my multiple faces or personalities that I might have.
3. I try to keep this blog away from my friends as much as possible. AND not be paranoid about it. If they are my friends they will not meddle or show unwanted interest. If they are not, I hope they slip on a banana peel and twist their neck for life. However much I would love to torture them slowly and kill them finally for not letting me have my privacy, it will never happen. I can never become a don or a murderer or a fighter however much I want to. I am going to be a plain ordinary civilian forever in this life, and there is NOTHING that will change it. I'll blame my parents for that. (Yeah, that's my first lame excuse of the blog. Wow.)

The following are some to-do notes for me:
1. I need to change the template as soon as I get some time. (Ha!)
2. After I have about 10-20 posts here, I need to evaluate whether the blog title is appropriate. Right now, I expect that all my posts will be extremely lame in nature. "Lame" meaning, "pathetically lacking in force or effectiveness" or "someone who doesn't understand what is going on", as according to http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=lame. Most posts will be triggered because I read something or hear something or experience something that is beyond my comprehension or understanding. Or something that I don't agree with even though it is an absolutely ordinary thing in the world. At these times, when there is no one to vent my frustrations at, this blog should come to my rescue; the place where I will rant, rave, scream and purge my troubled thoughts and then leave a cleaner soul, more at peace with himself, and able to get back to his mundane existence on this planet. In addition, this blog will also contain links to stuff that I come across that I find interesting on the Internet. I'd rather put these things here and reduce/stop sending my usual crap info emails to the various groups/mailing lists that I have access to.
3. Collate stuff to clutter up this blog of mine. Things like, a sitemeter (can somebody tell me which free sitemeter one is the best?) and flashy items like random quotes or a clock or a calendar etc.
4. Publish my blogroll here. This is useful for Google reasons. Not mandatory at all. Nobody needs to know that I exist. Nobody at all. I can want want and want to be famous. And dream dream and dream about it. It is just not going to happen. Deal with it. This blog is mine and mine alone. And I don't need visitors. They are welcome. But not needed. (Hey, then why do i want a sitemeter? I must be crazy.)

I am "Lame". I will publish on this blog with this name, whatever be the URL or that blog title. You can construe whatever you want to of this name that I have given myself. If you ask me, I think I call myself this because I have a severe lack of conviction in my thoughts. This is perhaps because I have never got any support from anyone. I have for some reason always stood out, not wanting OR BOTHERING to be "normal", but "right" always. And rarely managed to convince people to start thinking like me. And have in the process made many a soul unhappy. But I have till now been too selfish to bother about that. I am what I am. And I want to be what I am. I like myself, albeit not very proud of myself. There is nothing to be proud or vain of. But all in all, I am ok, I think. But with nobody to say that I am correct or right in what I do or think, I consider myself lame. Very Lame.

Hello Lame. Welcome to the world of blogging.



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